Tagged: changes in the family

 “Yesterday I was clever, so I wanted to change the world. Today I am wise, so I am changing myself.”

I read this and I can relate. No, I am not saying I suddenly became wise overnight, but I am saying I started thinking more wisely. The change to solo parenting is certainly an ever-evolving journey to looking more intricately inside oneself… even though life is more full on, a solo parent actually has more mental/emotional space as they are less one adult to be concerned about, for starters.  Here are some musings on the changes I have encountered in becoming a solo parent, and how I have helped my daughter to adapt to change.

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When we age we cast off the care and responsibilities of raising our children – as they move on with their lives, so do we. Freedom comes, to do as we please, to stay in our pyjamas all day, should we desire. To travel, garden, join clubs and lead a carefree life, but something happens in the form of a beautiful baby who has the ability to twist us around its tiny finger. Yes, “I am a grandparent”

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Changes in our family situation can occur at any time and for any number of reasons, and they may require some quite major changes in how we run our lives.  It’s interesting to consider how many of these changes are connected directly with one of our most fundamental needs: food.

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We often think of change as something scary; something to be avoided at all costs in some cases!  Whether you are adjusting your child’s daily routine, testing a new childcare arrangement or dealing with a difficult situation – we often take a reactionary stance, resisting this fearsome threat to our day-to-day comforts (which, let’s admit, we’ve worked hard for!).

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Becoming a mother can be like being on a roller-coaster, with many ups, downs and bumps along the way. Parenting provides little respite. New mums often discover time for themselves becomes lost in the unending responsibilities of parenthood. We find ourselves immersed in our numerous roles and responsibilities, and many of us forget the importance of retaining our own identity and maintaining our health and well-being.

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Life as we know it has a beginning, middle and end.  In between, of course, we go through various stages.  For example, we grow into young adults, generally get married, have children and then retire.  At each stage we invariably face challenges, and hope we are successful as we face any issues that cross our paths.

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Children are constantly grappling with increasingly new amounts of information, environments, activities, expectations, people and so much more. Helping children to adapt to change, and to become more resilient as people, is a vital life skill for parents to teach.  Continue reading »

When a new baby comes into the home it can be a trying time for everyone – including siblings. Sometimes any uncertainty or uneasiness on the sibling’s part can be lessened by making it something fun to look forward to. A lot of parents buy presents for new baby and siblings, which I love the idea of, especially if the sibling is able to give the gift to new baby or vice versa. Another really nice touch that the sibling can be proud of and look forward to showing new baby is by making some personalised paintings that can be hung in the nursery. Continue reading »

Although we are parents, we are also children.  The change in our parents often begins quite slowly with the odd bit of help here and there. For me, with my mother, it was some shopping from time to time. Sometimes when I came back with the shopping, she would say ”But you didn’t get mandarins!” I would grit my teeth and say very calmly, “But you didn’t have them on your list!”  Also I had to be on the end of the phone when a problem arose with her TV remote or the hot water cylinder or whatever.

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