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One essential aspect of lovingly nurturing and respecting yourself, is the intrinsic need to pay significant caring attention to your own intuition. As author Jeanne Elizabeth Blum writes in her book Women Heal Thyself, “Intuition is your most powerful ally – it can allow you to ‘tune-in’ to yourself, so you can get to know your own needs”.

Our vast reservoir of intuition is, many believe, a blessing given by the Universal Creator to every woman. However, in the ‘white noise’ of this modern world, it can be hard – near impossible – to find a pure stillness of mind and body for long enough to be able to tune-in to hear this great helper communicating with our spirit.

Before explaining what intuitive thoughts are, it is necessary to precede this with an explanation of what they are not. Intuitive thoughts are not logical, analytical, rational, reasonable, deductive, goal-orientated or time-aware. Sometimes they can first appear to be irrelevant, implausible, impossible, daft, crazy or completely insane – and even, occasionally, egotistically absorbed with your own self-importance. But that’s only what seems to be, not what is.

Intuition is simply, as Blum describes it, a “knowing or seeing without apparent effort”: it’s an instant attraction or an instant aversion; it’s nagging thoughts, great hunches, persistent ideas, energetic flashes, precognitive dreams, strong impulses, powerful gut feelings, mind-reading, a déjà vu experience, psychic knowing, or your ‘mummy-radar’ (which is particularly useful with toddlers!) It is a ‘not feeling right’ or a sense of knowing; it’s commonsense, a flying-by-the-seat-of-your-pants, the little voice within, a feeling of calm, or an urgent pull. It’s an epiphany, inklings, insight, instinct, inspiration, passion, knowingness, extra-sensory perception, spiritual revelation, the subconscious, the super-conscious, prophecy, a premonition, the fifth dimension, or the sixth sense – whatever you want to call it! And another thing about intuition … it’s always right.

But how can you tell when it’s real? Very simply: it’s when a fast thought enters your mind, and is usually accompanied by an emotional feeling, or tangible manifestation, e.g. an ache in your heart, or butterflies behind your belly-button, or knots in your stomach, or the hairs standing up on the back of your neck or on your arms, or an adrenaline rush to your heart and mind – you know what I’m talking about. Recognise it, this is your intuition, screaming.

Then when you start to contemplate more on the particular thought, often your conscious, rational mind will kick in, which has the frustrating ability to smother and drown intuition with logic, reason, hesitancy, disbelieve, fear and dread.

But, here’s the important truth, as also described by Blum: “Each time you acknowledge your intuition, you strengthen it – each time you deny your intuitive function, then you weaken your intuition.”

An effective way to cultivate your intuition is through turning off your brain’s Beta waves (which characteristically create alert, sensible, logical, apprehensive, anxious or fearful mindsets); and replacing them with Alpha waves (which are rhythmic, smooth, gentle, spontaneous and internally focused) and Theta waves (which are deep, meditative, stress-lowering and emotionally uplifting).

The alpha state is the ‘thinking of nothing in particular’ times when you can have your own ‘eureka’ moments. Nearly all the great thinkers of history experienced their most wondrous thoughts while in this not-deliberately-thinking alpha state. The theta state increases mental productivity, improves sleep and heightens intuition.

The most traditional ways to turn the beta waves down (relax your senses) and turn the alpha and theta waves up (increase your sensitivity), have been through pious practices such as meditation, mantric chants, prayer, worship and chakra yoga to ‘evoke the Kundalini’ – and many other ancient ascetic transcendent devotions.

If that is all way outside your comfort zone, then that’s fine, there are still lots of other ways to rest your mind. Rhythmic activities like swimming, jogging, dancing and walking on the beach or through a tranquil forest can all help. Immersing oneself in writing, listening to music, painting, sculpting, or reading inspiring philosophy or powerful poetry may be your thing. It’s simply a matter of finding a way to relax that suits you, which allows you to clear your emotions and balance your equilibrium by allowing your mind to drift.

Eventually, intuition can develop into your own best advisor … an inner knowing that has evolved into a powerful resource of foresight and personal enlightenment – an inherent wisdom of understanding, which you can always rely on for perfect guidance, even in the most difficult times. And when answers to questions or solutions to problems aren’t appearing, wait with an understanding that the reply will always arrive at exactly the right time.

As Blum writes, “Listen for the answers in your gut, as your Intuition will silently teach you what you need to do – especially in the role of Motherhood which needs you re rely on yourself to a degree usually never experienced in your life before!” One major advantage of listening to your own intuition, is that your Self is given an improved sense of purpose and completeness.

In the revolutionary late-1960s, author Malcolm Westcott extensively researched intuition and wrote Toward a Contemporary Psychology in Intuition, in which he describes intuitive people as having the following characteristics:

  • Confidence, independence, liberated self-sufficiency
  • Unconventionality, originality, spontaneity and curiosity – even eccentricity. They embrace the uncertainty, knowing that the ‘daily grind’ is not the only way to ‘get ahead’.
  • They love all aspects of life – pleasing and disappointing – and enjoy their position in the universe.
  • Emotionally involved in the abstract, they deliberately expose themselves to new ideas, stimulating experiences and opportunities for self-expression.
  • Understanding that truth is supposition and conjecture, they appreciate there aren’t always clear ‘right’ and ‘wrong’ decisions.
  • Unafraid of exploring uncertainties and absurd notions, and are prepared to ignore facts and logic.
  • Comfortable with and able to accept challenges and criticism, they are also able to reject and detach from it, if necessary.
  • Willing to change, but are resistant to outside control and direction.
  • Foresighted and discerning, they have strong integrity, humanitarian ethics, positive intentions, harmonious purpose and inner poise.
  • Being authentic to themselves they have discarded obsolete rationale. They will not give in for peace, harmony or someone else’s affection; and they have learnt to say “no”.

So, please don’t push your intuition aside. Many describe it as the only certain road to absolute truth. It can be your direct-dial mobile-phone to the infinite wisdom of your own soul, plus you gain a few friends on your side (such as guides, angels, saints, gods, goddesses, the Universal Creator, Jesus, Mary, Allah, Vishnu, Buddha, Mohammad, Confucius, Granddad Pat, Great Aunty Nell) . . . it’s all there for your unlimited access if you heed your intuition, take note of what it instructs you to do, be mindful of what it‘s telling you . . . and learn to trust it.

And know too, it can take (and can be meant to take) a lifetime to get right! We are all works in progress.

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Kathy is a wife; mother of three; north Auckland self-employed midwife; weekly Parenting columnist; founding director of BabyOK™ Products (producers of the renowned Babe-Sleeper); and author of NZ’s No.1 guide for new mums “OH BABY…Birth, Babies & Motherhood Uncensored” and the sequel “OH GROW UP…Toddlers to PreTeens Decoded”. You can find out more about Kathy on her website.

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